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Postmodern Village
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A Rain Forest Died For Their Sins:
The Plague of Memos

 

To: All staff

From: Dr. Emmett Dodson

Date: March 16, 2001

Re: Professionalism at work

Please do not sleep in your offices with the door open; it does not exactly confirm our students' belief that they are receiving the best possible education.

Do not have sexual intercourse at work. Wandering the halls in a nightgown is simply inappropriate, as is installing a bed in your office. (Please see our policy on sexual harrassment.)

Do not bring your pets, children, or other dependents to work.

See-though shirts, "booty-baring shorts," and other such suggestive clothing should not be worn. Consult an L. L. Bean, Land's End, or Eddie Bauer catalog for ideas about appropriate casual clothing.

Your cooperation is appreciated.


Dr. Emmett Dodson

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