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© 1999-2016
Postmodern Village
e-mail * terms * privacy
the typical purchaser
by Francine DuBois


WHEN I ORDER A VODKA,
I EXPECT

Babble on, my Arctic queen, while grey geese
Are beheaded behind you. Smile for the camera,
Serve us stew, a Susie Homemaker with
Stilettos of gold . . . not that you paid for them.
Your wardrobe costs more than my house.
Your wardrobe costs more than your own annual salary.

WHEN I ORDER A VODKA,
I EXPECT

I can see Russia from the bottom of this glass
And it looks dry. Pour me--and you--another.
I want to watch you spill something on
Your borrowed clothes, have to explain to Daddy
What happened when you smash the car.
Doubles? Why not? You're not buying.

WHEN I ORDER A VODKA,
I EXPECT

Who is that man?! The loud one?
Oh, he bought your daughter underwear through
Donations to the Republican National Committee.
He buys you leather jackets. He buys you
Bridges to nowhere. So this is what
Being anti-abortion and pro-oil will get you:
Shopping sprees at Neiman Marcus.
Just remember. I bet he'll expect
You to put out, and he may not
Respect you in the morning.

Francine's Version -- Hezekiah's Version
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