I Listen to Nuclear Weapons / Look

EastWesterly Review Dada Cluster

Issue 40 * Spring 2018

The EastWestern University Dada Cluster is a society dedicated to using dictionary, grammar and translation tools to "fix" works of literature. Here, though, they just tackle the dadaism of everyday life in these United States. Spacing, punctuation and italics have been modified in the new version, but no words have been altered in the machine translation.

[ Original -> Russian -> Korean -> Russian -> English]

I Listen to Nuculear Weapons

I listen to nuclear weapons.

My uncle was a great professor, scientist and engineer
Dr. John Trump of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

Well, if you are a conservative Republican,
I know if you run,
Well, if you're a liberal democrat,
like a good gene, a very good gene, a good,
very smart Wharton financial school, very smart

They say I'm one of the smartest people in the world - it's true!

You know, I have what I have

When you are a conservative Republican, they do
Oh, they make a number
So we always want to always start,
we offer our credentials because of a little deprivation

but you
I'm really worried about the fact that I'm selling nuclear weapons
it seems so simple,
it's not as important as nuclear energy

However, when he sees
what's going on with your prisoners,
now there are three or four of them,
but I'm still now

     When I buy three, I tell them:
all you guys are because this guy,
they know, because they know,
Rewards do not make you realize that
women are smarter now than men,
but they do not, so you can know
that they will need about 150 years

great negotiations, so they just die, they just killed us.

Original Text

"Look, having nuclear—my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart —you know, if you're a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I'm one of the smartest people anywhere in the world—it's true!—but when you're a conservative Republican they try—oh, do they do a number—that's why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortune—you know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because we're a little disadvantaged—but you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers me—it would have been so easy, and it's not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what's going to happen and he was right—who would have thought?), but when you look at what's going on with the four prisoners—now it used to be three, now it's four—but when it was three and even now, I would have said it's all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they don't, they haven't figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, it's gonna take them about another 150 years—but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us."

Transcription courtesy Stig Abell via Huffington Post